The Game Changer

Is the old saying "He doesn't want it until he can't have it" really ring true? Give the man a little competition and the whole game changes. Why do we always have to play games in a relationship? Do we ever really outgrow games as a a child or does the game just change as we get older?

I was taught from an early age that if you ever really want to keep a man interested...never let them know how interested you really are! I thought at that young age, that's crazy! When I fall in love someday, I will shower him with my love all day everyday...just like in the fairytale! Well as sad as it say, if you ever want a man to run as fast as he can for the hills ladies, that's the fastest way to make them do it. It seems weird to think that being the "perfect" dotting girlfriend or wife can actually make a man find you unattractive but it's true. The simple truth is what a man really wants is THE HUNT! Even if he already "has" you...the last thing you ever want him to know is exactly that. The sad truth is that if the game or the chase ever stops...the game is in fact over!

That is why no matter how long you have been married, dating or in a relationship...the chase can never end. Call it primal instinct for the man to chase his prey or his mate, or that the boy inside of him really never grows up. Once a man feels like he has won, or has conquered the game, sadly the game becomes obsolete or at the least uninteresting and boring. My advise is no matter what you do in life, whether it's relationships, career or anything you do...NEVER BECOME UNINTERESTING! Always find a way to keep a man on his toes and even wondering what you are doing. By all means be honest and truthful in your relationship, but being honest doesn't mean being an open book! 

In fact use a book as a great example...if you already know the ending to a book are you likely to keep reading it anyways? Most likely not! There always needs to be a level of intrigue or mystery in life and especially in relationships! That's what keeps you yearning for more and striving for the best in life. Well the same goes in our relationships. We have to have mystery and curiosity with the people we surround ourselves with. After all...nothing in life worth having comes easy, and if it is too easy or accessible we really don't want it anyways!

Do All Men Live In A Tent?

If you have spent much time on any dating websites, then you will know what I mean when I ask the question..."Do all men live in a tent anymore?" Is it just me or does it seem like all men live outdoors? It seems that I can't find any man who's interests or hobbies don't read "love to spend as much time outdoors" or "loves camping, fishing, and hunting". Followed by 20 pictures of them next to a dead deer proud as could be...holding their prized fish, or drinking their 10th beer on a canoe. 


Now don't get me wrong, I like to get away from civilization once or twice a year...to get "in tune" with nature, but I don't not want to spend every weekend in the middle of nowhere looking for a bush with my name on it! Is it too much to ask to find a man who likes a nice dinner, a play or maybe a concert? My idea of a hot date just isn't spending the weekend in a hot sweaty tent, covered in bug repellent, hoping that I put on enough deodorant so that a bear doesn't smell me 5 miles away!


Now I know this doesn't apply to all women...I realize there are many of you out there who love roughing it and God bless ya, but for the most part...ask a woman if she would rather spend the weekend in a fifth wheel or a five star hotel and I guarantee you 9 out of 10 women will chose the room service over the campfire smell embedded into their pores for 48 hours. We will take the manicures over splinters, and the soft memory foam bed over that beat up old foam roll out mat and flannel sleeping bag! After all...nothing says romance like trying to put on sexy lingerie in a port-a-potty! 

Dating In The Virtual World

When did it become necessary to update my daily status? Do people really care what I did last night or how I'm going to spend my upcoming weekend? Don't get me wrong...I thoroughly enjoy seeing my High School boyfriend that dumped me the night before prom, gloating about his third baby and wife that looks like Angelina Jolie. However do I really need to know that the guy I went out with last night has a date with the cocktail waitress that served our drinks this weekend? Why do I want to know this? Can't I please somehow live in that wonderful world of denial and pretend he lost his phone, his laptop crashed, and of course it was just too dark when he took me home to remember where I live!

There are so many wonderful benefits that come with the world of social networks and dating websites, but do the pro's really out weight the con's? I mean it's great that before we even go on our first date, he already knows my favorite foods, movies, taste in music and don't forget has seen that embarrassing picture Aunt Jane tagged me in wearing the Christmas sweater she knitted me last year.

Of course if everything goes well and you go on that all important second date, it almost feels like it should be the twelfth date since you already know so much about one another. You have already seen pictures of his ex-wife thanks to good ole Facebook, and I'm sorry that is not an image you want in your head, and should be never be seen until at least the twentieth date!

Hopefully that second date goes well...how can it not right? You wore those oh so sexy circulation restricting jeans, and the shirt that so carefully hides the muffin top you just can't seem to get rid of! Why wouldn't he call, text or at least email right? I wonder do we make ourselves a little too accessible these days? In this day and age we have our home phones, cell phones, email, IM's, Facebook, Myspace and don't forget the all too informative Twitter. Why in this day and age do we feel the need for people to know our every move, thought or the lovely embarrassing moments of our lives? Of course I've found myself caught up in the virtual world...it almost feels as though you are out of touch if you aren't technologically "in tune" with the world. Not to mention if you are single in such a high tech world it seems everyone meets online in some form or another. Are bar scenes becoming a thing of the past?

Someday our kids will ask us "Mommy how did you meet Daddy?" and we will have to say "Well sweetheart, this one crazy night...I decided to go on this website, create an informative profile of my likes and dislikes, upload a halfway descent picture of myself and date twenty men in cyberspace, until that all important day of my life when Daddy sent a virtual wink to me!" Aww how romantic!

The Beginning

Well since this is my first blog entry I figured I would start by telling you a little bit about where I'm coming from...first and foremost you should know that I'm a mom to a beautiful little girl that is the joy of my life. It's hard to imagine my life before she arrived. She is now 5 years old and is full of life in every way possible. She always keeps me on my toes and I love every second of it! 


I am recently divorced, which I never thought would happen. I definitely didn't go into marriage thinking "I will give this a shot and see how it goes!" I truly and whole heartily thought it would be forever. This month would have been my 9 year anniversary, and in many ways it feels like the end of one chapter in my life but a new beginning to the next chapter and hopefully a better one. Scary as can be, but also very refreshing and liberating! Don't get me wrong there are definitely moments when I wish things could go back to when "times were good" but I try not to focus on that, and know that even better times are ahead of me.



I tend to look at life as each day is a fresh start...a new beginning of hopefully good times and good memories. My life has been filled with so many ups and downs but then again who's life hasn't right? Everyone has a story to tell of good times and bad, that to me is what makes life worth living. So many people ask me what my plans are now that my life has changed so much, but honestly I try not to plan my life out. I would honestly rather take it one step at a time and see where life takes me. Don't get me wrong I think it is very important to have goals and dreams...where would we be without them? Wandering souls trying to find our way in life right? I guess what I have learned most in life is call it God, fate, karma whatever you believe...life just has an amazing way of throwing curve balls at you! You think you have everything going in a certain direction, right on track as you might say...and BAM life throws you a curve ball. If your not ready for it, it will hit you upside the head!



To me life is a journey...a beautiful journey if you chose it to be. If you focus on the negative in life, you will miss out on all the positive and good in this world. Everyone goes through hard times, even life changing devastating times...and the way you survive and learn from them is all in how you perceive them. We all have moments of weakness, of depression, sadness and sorrow...but if we focus on those times instead of seeing the laughter or the joy, what is the real point of living?



Life has an amazing way of balancing itself out...the yin and yang of the world. If all we have in life is good, then we don't appreciate it and we often take it for granted. We have to have the bad or hard times in order to appreciate the good things in life! No matter what curve ball life throws at you, try to embrace it...find the good in it...and hopefully it wont smack you upside the head quite so hard.